We figured out that we could have water, just not hot water, while waiting for the plumber. I’m literally boiling a vat of water right now so that I can take a bath in what I’m hoping will be warm water. I would have easily* braved the cold shower, except out faucets seem to require some pressure on the hot water side.

• “Easily” being used loosely of course. I’m certain I would have shrieked like a little girl being chased by mountain lions the moment I dipped my toe in.

Update:
A boiling vat of hot water does nothing to raise the temperature of a bath tub. It only adds insult to the entirely uncomfortable situation of freezing to your inner core.