Michael Buffington

There a Few Machines I'd

Wednesday, October 17 2001

There a few machines I’d like invented:

I want a true diaper genie (place kid in/on machine, machine changes diaper, no smell, crying, no mess).

I want something that will whip up a quesadilla in no time flat, and make a big ruckus while doing so.

I want a haircutting maching, but it has to do it’s business while I sleep, as I’m not to be bothered with hair related items.

I could go for a machine that would take care of junk mail in my house, and turn it into something useful, like logs, or furniture, or maybe just squeeze the mail into oblivion, so I can have unnaturally heavy pellets. Imagine that, a machine that makes 5 pound pellets in the size of a marble. That would be something.

And maybe a machine that follows me around, anticipating my inevitable sitting down mode. It would be like a little chair. I’d never have to worry about falling down, I’d just begin the process of sitting down, and the machine would rise to meet my sitting parts. I could completely remove the “must have chair before sitting down” condition from my brain, because this machine would always be there, just as air is always there to breath.

That’s what I love about being able to write code. In the computer world, I can whip these “machines” up. If I need something done, I just think of it, and I can see the code in my head. Maybe if I knew how to mold plastic, solder circuit boards, and construct physically sound structures I’d be able to have my SitSitTM

machine.